Be BOLD, Be Brave, Be YOU

This is a blog that aims to do nothing but tell you exactly how I feel at this moment in time…

Never have I ever been so disappointed and full to the brim with inexplicable feelings towards the Education system, the Government and the challenges most of us face when it comes to both.

Having spent nineteen years in education, training to become what I thought would be an employable individual seeking a role within the arts, I still cannot succeed in a role which is undoubtedly suited to my qualifications, experience and skill. During all my years in education I have worked hard in many different sectors in the labour market. From stacking shelves, customer service and sales to book editing, teaching and project coordination. I have a positive approach to everything I do, I remain calm under pressure and offer excellent communication skills. I can plan to cater for any needs. I can teach. I can be an inspiration and I have the capacity to learn fast and well. Yet here I am, twenty six years of age and still desperately seeking my dream job.

Hours of my time has been spent writing the perfect applications to suit roles which I would love to achieve; programme managers for arts charities, teaching roles in a performing arts environment and learning officers or management within growing art establishments. More time has then been spent, after being offered interviews, to prepare project plans, budget materials and perfect answers to their questions, which aim to prove me suitable for their role. But still I am unemployed with a list of sodden excuses as to why I am not good enough.

I am a person who lives for laughter and love. I thrive on positive thinking. I put in 110% effort in to everything that I do. My qualifications range from diplomas to post graduate degrees. I volunteer, I am caring, I am helpful and creative. I work both collaboratively and independently. I am organised, good at prioritising workloads and enjoy pressure and being busy. I have the biggest passion for achieving and doing everything I can to succeed. I dream of becoming an asset to an organisation whose aim is to inspire, particularly young people, through art forms and support these people in achieving things they didn’t believe possible. I want to give young people the best possible chance to succeed in life, because as we all know, it is a tough life that we live.

Art is frowned upon. “it’s a drop out course” “it gets you nowhere” “You will fail” BULLSHIT!
Art is so vast and so incredibly inspiring to not just young people, but all of us. Open your eyes and look around at all the beauty in this world; architecture, gardens, paintings, statues, literature, music. None of which would have been possible without an artistic, imaginative, creative mind. It can support people through difficult times. It can make people happy. It can provoke emotion we didn’t even know we could feel. Yet here we are telling our future that art is unnecessary. Wake up!

My biggest ambition is to make a difference in people’s lives using art as a catalyst. Whether that be as a teacher, a project coordinator or running an art organisation. I have never felt so passionate about something in my whole life and I am being shot down for not having enough experience or the correct skillset. Sue me for not having all these qualities written down on a piece of paper and signed off by some dude who leans back in his spinning chair all day. Give me a chance to PROVE it to you.

Fair play to all those people who attended the same interviews I did and achieved the role. You must have bought more to the table and for that, I congratulate you. Good for you for keeping the spirit of the arts alive and being able to expose all your abilities, passions and experience to the employer. I tried my best. I tried my absolute hardest to achieve. I worked myself to the bone to be the best I can be. I wish it was enough. I wish I could tell you that I have acquired the job that lets me practice all my talents, my qualities my passions and my skillset. I want to make you proud of me. Each and every single one of you. I want my Mum to be able to tell her friends that I am happy as Larry working in the industry I long to thrive in. I want my brother to feel inspired by his baby sister. I want my friends to hear all the wonderful stories I have to share about my working environment. I’d love to report back to my teachers, tutors and mentors that I am ‘living the dream’.

There are so many emotions running through me at the moment. My heart is literally pumping out a different one with each beat. Failure, disappointment, strength, anger, loss, bravery, positivity, upset, passion, determination, irritancy, rejection, pity… the list goes on and on. It is so difficult to sit here and write this, but in the same way I feel more and more relieved after each word.

What am I doing so wrong? What makes me so unemployable in the field of work that I so badly aspire to be a part of? It is hard times. Rejection. Rejection. Rejection. Rejection is my biggest fear and here I am, dwelling in its hand. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going is all that echoes around my head.

To all of you who are working just as hard as I am to achieve, to succeed, to be everything you wished to be when you were young… It is a tough fight and dreams don’t work unless you do, so keep going. At least, that is what I keep telling myself. A dear friend of mine sent me a card once, which displayed the words “Be Bold, Be Brave, Be You”. I try to live by this every single day – through all the best times and all the bad times. Because that is all I have to give this world; someone bold, someone brave, me.

 

 

If you have any questions or comments please do let me know: amieblinks@gmail.com

Everything's Changing

Since my last blog which expressed my joyous feelings about moving to Cornwall I am devastated to announce that this journey will no longer be happening. Sadly, the sale on my house down there fell through, which means I am staying put in my hometown of Bicester. Whilst this is not what I wanted, I am happy to be staying in Bicester for a while as it means I can continue to have close friendships with people here. Unfortunately, I have sacrificed my job with OYAP Trust as they hired my replacement, shortly after my advisory that I would be moving away. There is now no funding for me to stay on. Another truly saddening event. 

OYAP has been my place of work for 8 months and with each day I have grown to love the work they do as a charity and I do for them more and more. It has been a dream job working with creative people, being able to use the creative side of my brain to develop and coordinate exciting activities for young people to get involved in. Even the meetings were inspiring and brilliant to be a part of and left me feeling motivated and full of ideas for not just the activities I coordinate, but also crafts, teaching tips and my career. Having the opportunity to work with a variety of wonderful people, each skilled in many different art forms, has been amazing. I am constantly inspired in their presence and wanting to do more for OYAP and their participants day after day. My favourite moments with OYAP include putting together a youth action team in Banbury and watching the young people succeed in planning and coordinating their own creative acts of kindness for their community. A significant project which will stay with me is when the young people designed and created cushions for elderly people and we all delivered the cushions into a care home. This particular project was featured in the Banbury Cake Newspaper. 

Another favourite moment was watching the success of the first project I coordinated in its entirety - UnFrozen. A theatre and set design project based on Disney's popular Frozen, which ran over October half term 2014. It was a huge sell out and the performance created in just 2 days was enough to bring the proud parents to tears! It was a wonderful celebration of theatre, singing, dancing and indeed the Frozen soundtrack. 

Finally, working with Heyford Park Free School has to be up their with the top favourites. Another project completely coordinated by me! After getting in touch with the school I successfully recruited artists to join me each week in providing lunchtime art activities for the students. These ranged from puppetry to animation, photography to sculpting! We have successfully seen the students through their Arts Awards too, which has been a very rewarding process for both them and OYAP. I will miss going into the school each week and working with such talented children. 

My Current State of Mind

A blog aiming to just summarise briefly my current thoughts on all the changes going on in my life, leading up to, hopefully, my fresh start at this life I lead and love.

I didn't think in a million years I would ever move away from my home here. I love Bicester, and I am such a home comforts girl that I never dreamed of moving 4 hours down the road! Not a chance. But here I am, finding amazing, heart warming, one in a billion kind of people, and moving to Cornwall. It is unbelievable what life can throw at you - good and bad - but I am so grateful for the journey and experiences I have had so far. I cannot wait to see where life takes me when I get down there. I just know in my heart it is the best move, the greatest decision and the wisest choice for me at this point in my life. A fresh start.

Everyone I know down there, who looks forward to me joining them, makes me really count my blessings. These people who make my heart burn with a bright desire to just be there already. My tummy feels like your tongue would straight after sipping a boiling hot drink. It burns with a passion for Cornwall and my new life there, that I am so excited to just get started. I need to be careful though as it is making me drift through what I have here and I don't want to regret not making the most of my last few months in Bicester. Already I am being pushed out by some people who I have loved for years, maybe because they feel less willing to put effort in as they know I am leaving? I don't know their reasoning but it makes me truly sad to know people are like that, but at the same time, it is really proving who my friends are. The process of moving shouldn't affect these things in a person's life, however one cannot forcefully change another's opinion or decision and so if that is what they deem right to do, so be it. I hope they are happy, as I know I will be in the long run.

Here I am though, sat like a sitting duck just waiting for my life to really start, because I know the date 'May 26th 2015' is going to be the most significant in all my life yet. That is when I can truly become my own person. I absolutely cannot wait. Until then I will continue to miss Cornwall and my Cornish family and friends. They are the colour in my life down there. Everything else if still very much in a grey area, but they are shining at me like a rainbow. How lucky I am to have you all. To have my Auntie Trish, my cousins and second cousins! To have Jack, Connor, Shannon - my new soul mates who I love tons and tons! But also, back home to have my Mother who has supported me through excitement and a lot of over analysing of paperwork! I will miss her everyday. She will always hold a piece of my heart which will stay here in Bicester. My brother, Adam, who has shown me he can be the rock I have always seen in him, the epitome of who a brother should be. Caring, kind, loving, thoughtful and so supportive in ways I didn't think he could be. My Bicester friends who have chosen to stick by me through this life changing decision and support me with encouragement and comfort. Colleagues at work who have offered their heart warming statements of kindness and expressed their sadness in my choice to leave. OYAP Trust has been a job which has bought me into myself and I will always be inspired by my director Helen Le Brocq, for her fantastic experiences and outlook on life and my manager Caroline Tress, for her kind, supportive and caring nature. Thank you each - you have all aided in my happiness and encouraged me to make this move with a positive attitude and a huge grin on my face.

I am lucky, I feel blessed and I was compelled to blog about this today.

Earth Meets Sky

On Wednesday 19th February I attended a vocal technique and performance workshop at The Mill Arts Centre, Banbury, England. This workshop was provided by the Children's Art Charity I work for, OYAP Trust, and aimed to give young people an opportunity to create music performances together, working with professional artists from the music industry. 

Juliet Russell was the significant facilitator, who is a singer, composer and vocal coach on BBC's popular The Voice. Alongside Juliet was Flexie, a musician from London and Fred, a session drummer. The team together created a fantastic and inspiring atmosphere, which lead to all the participants forming a piece of individual music. 

The session saw us learning new techniques, significantly using our voices; basslines, melodies and beatboxing to name a few! We formed melodies as a group and used rounds and harmonies to produce exciting sounds and atmospheric songs. We were pulled in and out of our comfort zones as we each explored elements of music we hadn't tried before. For me, mixing up time signatures within a song and putting lyrics and a melody to these changes was most challenging, but thanks to Fred's support and encouragement from others, I was able to succeed in performing this task. It boosted my confidence as a singer and inspired me to learn to play an instrument so I can begin a process of writing my own music. 

Yesterday I was also lucky enough to meet some fantastic people, who truly inspired me to get back into singing and music once more. This was my favourite part of the day as I was able to learn about other emerging musicians who were present and watching them perform their incredible talents. From singers to rappers to violinists to drummers, the day had an exciting vibe running through the air as we explored deeper aspects of music and explored everyone's different genres and styles. 

I want to thank Zaylie from OYAP Trust for organising such an incredible event and a HUGE thanks goes to Juliet, Flexie and Fred for facilitating such a great project. Earth Meets Sky inspired young people across Oxfordshire to dive into the deep end and boost their confidence, learn creative new ways to express themselves through music and develop their music technique. 

A truly inspiring day to experience, I am looking forward to seeing the video pieced together from the best bits of the project.  

Up-cycling

Up-cycling... who knew?!

About a month ago I bought this beauty for £10...

I was inspired by my favourite app, Pinterest, to up-cycle an old filing cabinet for my new home. After searching through countless blogs and 'how to' videos I decided to take matters into my own hands and give it a go using my own imagination. 

Originally I wanted to paint the whole thing yellow as it's such a happy colour and thought it would look lovely and keep me smiling in my new home. The idea was to then glue floral fabric, which complimented the yellow, to the drawers to give it a shabby chic feel. However, the paint failed, probably because it wasn't paint created for metal! And so my brain started to process new ideas and suddenly I had a thought. 

I bought around 2 metres of floral fabric, a dark colour with bright pinks in the flowers, and some mod-podge (Modified porridge me and a friend call it - which it absolutely isn't by the way!) The mod-podge was the adhesive of choice I used to paste the whole thing and then press fabric on to it. I decided the drawers would have to have a different pattern or colour, otherwise the whole thing would look to stocky! I purchased some more floral material and before I knew it I had a completed, up-cycled filing cabinet... 

I don't think I could be happier with this and I cannot wait to get it into my new home. 

Make a Change

Make a Change

Let’s do something good, let’s do something kind

Let’s use our imaginations, just sat there in our minds.

In a world that suffers, let’s do something good

Let’s take positive action, bring it to our neighbourhood.

The more often we meet, the more often we plan

To take away negative portrayals, to show everyone we can.

Join us to make a difference, let’s make a change

Let’s become something worthy, make that change today.

~ Amie Johnson, 29/01/2015 ~

~ Inspired by the Youth Action Teams of OYAP Trust ~

As some of you may know, I work for a Children's Art Charity, who are devoted to encouraging arts within the young people of today. It is something I have so much passion for and commitment to and today, whilst working on a project, I was inspired to write this short poem to encourage positive change. 

A Youth Action Team is a group of young people who express interest in using art as a catalyst to make positive changes within their communities. As someone who has always gone out of my way to make people happy, even strangers, this project is the highlight of my job. Engaging young people and supporting them to take creative action within their communities for the sake of others is something I truly love to do. It is something I believe we should all do a little more of when we can. 

This morning a lady greeted me and it made me happy. Moments later I greeted another passing stranger with hopes that they will pass along the happiness and 'spread the joy'. Even something as little as this can spark happiness within someone, so if you pass someone, acknowledge them, say "hello". 

Maybe you want to take it a step further and help create other changes? The Youth Action Teams at OYAP Trust are working hard to make these changes happen, and support is always sought. For more details on our Youth Action Teams and updates of what they have been up to visit: www.oyap.org.uk and check out our projects page. 

I hope they can inspire you as much as they inspire me. 

When?

Just some lyrics/poem I've been working on.

Why did you do this
What were you thinking
How could you do this
Where is this going
Who are you?

A puncture wound left untreated
A burst awakens the night
A compass that has no needle
A frown kept out of sight.

Two hearts sewn together as one
Two minds lay awake alert
Two pictures blurred from vision
Two dreams reenact the hurt.

Anger is rising
Tears are falling
Body is aching
My heart is calling.

Why did you do this
What were you thinking
How could you do this
Where is this going
Who are you?

The jungle is growing darker
The peace is turning to rage
The core is beginning to fail
The processor trapped in a cage.

One more time to see a spark light
One last time to place a kiss
One more look to find a life line
One last moment to stop this.

Anger is rising
Tears are falling
Body is aching
My heart is calling.

Why did you do this
What were you thinking
How could you do this
Where is this going
Who are you?

A mystery is unforgivable
A mind ticks on over thinking
A question will go unanswered
A path is suddenly sinking.

A face, a memory, a painful burn.
A time, a moment, a dream.
A life, a happiness, a unique smile.
A love, a present, a team.

Who are you
Where is this going
How could you do this
What were you thinking
Why did you do this?

Nicky Morgan causes an uprisal - thoughts?

Rememberance day this year was celebrated by a sea of ceramic poppies surrounding one of London's most famous, and aesthetically beautiful, landmarks. Thousands of people flooded in to pay their respects 100 years on from WW1 and see this incredible sight. It was truly breathtaking. And all of that was sparked by an idea by someone who had a creative mind. One artistic thought lead to this historical, memorable and wonderfully moving exhibition. And you think creativity isn't important? Even the idea of the poppy is a woek of art! 

Look around you, we are surrounded by the arts. It's on the cereal box you reach for each morning, it's the car you drive to work, the streets you walk down and buildings you see, it's that jacket you fancy on that stranger. Without the arts we would be a dull race. Without the arts millions of people wouldn't be inspired. Without the arts we would be a blank canvas, with no artist to create a scene worth sticking around for. 

Miss Potter

I just watched Miss Potter.

I feel so warmed and like I've witnessed something truly lovely. I will try to write this without spoiling anything for anyone who is yet to see this beautiful film. But here goes...

Miss Potter follows the story of Beatrix Potter, author, creative and artist of Peter Rabbit and friends. We witness her childhood and how her imagination works. The talents that grow from her mind are inspiring and the deeper into the film we go, the more beautiful each second becomes. Of course, as with anyone's life, there are many ups followed by many downs but her moral is to always find a way to happiness. In fact she says that's her favourite thing about stories, the deliciousness of the first line and how you never know where they will take you.

Renee is stunning and portrays a wonderful Miss Potter. Her mischievous smile and blush really creates a believable persona who you can relate to. My favourite moment in this film is where Beatrix cries with happiness. It is a rare moment on the big screen, and not one many actors can pull off. But in comes Renee with her natural beauty and talent and performs with perfection. She should be very proud for this role.

In conclusion, this film, this story has made me feel inspired to write more, to believe in more and to really live life to the fullest. To hold onto what you want and believe in and go for it. Make it yours. Really chase your dreams.
I feel revived and cannot wait to have the time to write more and produce my own work of art.

Live, laugh, love.

Solo rider #3 - the conclusive blog

The WiFi here in Tunisia has been ups and downs so, I have unfortunately been unable to update my blog about my experiences within this wonderful country. Here, I say wonderful as in literally full of wonders. Many times I found myself decoding puzzles of the country I did not understand, and enjoying the solutions and answers I was educated with. 

But lets start where I left off... Day 2.

The Amphitheatre of Thysdrus

Known to be the second largest Amphitheatre in the world, The Amphitheatre of Thysdrus, located in the town of El Drem, was breathtaking. A stunning piece of ruined architecture that towered above the poverty ridden town below. Famous not only for its history, but more modernly recognised as the template for The Gladiator's setting, Thysdrus was built in the 3rd century AD.

Whilst exploring the Amphitheatre I visited the underground dungeons where they kept animals, namely lions and such alike, before the Gladiator games began and both Gladiator and lion met their fate. Along the walls you can see evidence of their discomfort in the form of scars and markings. Who can blame them? After being captured and then transported to a tiny cell where they remain until they are called to battle and killed, just for the entertainment of locals.

I also climbed to the highest point of the tallest section of the ruined building and was able to look out for miles across the landscape of Tunisia. One side presented a long strip of road lined with flat buildings and a vast bell tower that stood proudly, looking down on all of its surroundings. The other side treated the eye to an insight into the town of El Djem, populated by around 18,000. Cars sped along narrow roads and dodged the inhabitants as they seemingly crawled like ants along the dry roads under 37°C heat. On this side stood a small bell tower, in comparison to the bell tower adjacent to it.

The delicate building that divided these two sides stood gracefully, regardless of the amount which had crumbled away from its foundations over time. The walls hosted a fabulous gold colour which created an ancient, yet beautiful, feel to the historic site. The remaining structure, resonating a half finished puzzle, was fascinating to the eye and allowed for a 'travel back in time', cultural experience.

During my time in Tunisia there were days where, inevitably, I felt lonely. Day three was one of those days. A Saturday, a day I would normally spend in the pleasant company of friends. This was when the worst of my loneliness happened. I had spotted a few couples that day and the pang of envy shot through me so hard, my heart physically ached for my recent lost love. 

A similar feeling occurred as I witnessed friends grouped together, laughing and sharing happy memories and anecdotes. It took a lot of strength to remind myself that I had that aspect (friendship) of my life too and it was my decision to leave that behind whilst I journeyed to Tunisia alone. 

The truth is the experience I have had has changed me and created a stronger and happier spirit within me. One which I will always be thankful to have inside my body, guiding me through the ups and downs of life. I don't regret a single part of my time away, even the lowest moments, because I know I had to feel that emotion, understand that pain, to achieve the status I have become : stronger, happier and ready for the next chapter of my life to begin.

Day 5 - The Medina Ramble 

Another noteworthy time during my stay is when I took on the haggling experience in Tunisia's oldest city, The Medina. Whilst telling you I haggled prices of handbags and pashminas is all good and fun, what I really want to report is the new knowledge I achieved that day. 

Since arriving in Tunisia it has been evident that doors are an important aspect to their culture. Tunisians decorate their doors using mainly studs and coloured paints, and this had me wondering the reason behind it. I learnt that day it marked the status of the family living behind those doors. It is a way of telling people how wealthy (or not) you are. The more studs presented on the door, the richer a family are said to be. (I know, WOW!) 

 

Whilst visiting Tunisia's smallest city we came across a café which had a rooftop view which enabled me to take this photo...

I find it striking and aesthetically appealing. The levels and the bland colours gives the picture a sort of educational value about Tunisian culture. I could stare for hours, hypnotised, just making up lives for my creation of people who live beyond the walls of each settlement in the picture. Bare in mind this photo is taken whilst on a roof top that resides above a busy and bustling market. It makes for an interesting shot. The houses in this picture come to life in my eyes.

2 days remain and I want to do something I have never even had the slightest interest in doing before. Henna. 

When speaking to a new acquaintance of mine in Tunisia, Wasim, a henna tattooist, he illustrated my name in Arabic writing. I enjoyed the patterns of the drawing so much it made me wonder about whether or not to put some Arabic on my body in the form of henna. I visited his stall and had him write for me a few words that came to mind. But it was the second word I requested that stuck. 

For years I have disliked tattoos, I think an opinion I have inherited from my dear mother! However, when asked "if you absolutely had to have a tattoo, what would you have?" I always said I would have an olive to represent my late Nanny, Olive. She was my favourite person in the whole world. We wrote to one another very often, and religiously whilst I was away at university studying. She was an inspiration, the head of the family. Her comfort was so valuable to me. I loved her with all of my heart, as we used to say in our letters "to pieces". After telling this story to Wasim and debating having an olive drawn upon my skin in this semi-permanent ink, it was suggested I, instead, have her name in Arabic illustrated along my foot. After seeing my Nanny's name formed in Arabic letters I loved the idea and instantly agreed.

Once this henna was sitting comfortably upon my foot I was flicking through some other designs and I came across an illustration that literally showed me the reason for my independent adventure. The picture was of an ECG scan, linked between two words which created an uprising of butterflies in my stomach, 'Just Live'. This was an absolute moment of realisation that since my heart break I have forgotten to live my life. It sounds silly to say because as long as you're breathing, you're living, right? But that isn't what life is about. "Life is a gift, not a given right." I seemed to have lost sight of this fact during my months of sleepless nights and sorrowful days. I couldn't see past my nose for the ache that just seemed to grow inside me, swallowing me whole and creating a vibe of negative energy flow from me. Surround me. Squeeze me into this tight space in my broken heart and repeatedly remind me of the pain I was experiencing. Asking me all the questions that begin with why? 

It is only now I am starting to truly appreciate again that I have been given this life and am still living. My future self is urging me to keep going because I believe she knows that things are going to get better for me. She is encouraging me forward until I meet her in a much happier place in my life. I don't know when I will arrive in that place, but I know that thanks to that simple sketch I am excited to be there, and ready to take on all the obstacles to get there.

As I said, this break away has left me feeling much more positive and strong as a person. When I left I was heart broken, apprehensive, scared even of the thought of being alone, lonely and all by myself. Even dreading the nights I'd spend alone, looking up at my ceiling all night just going over every detail about my failed relationship to try and find some sort of resolution that would solve my heart ache and struggle. And also help me understand why it happened in the first place. After just 7 days I am feeling replenished, stocked up with strength, happiness and zen. Imagine what I could become in a month, a year?! (If only work would allow such luxurious amounts of time off!!) There are still parts of me that hurt and FEEL broken, of course, but I have learnt that time heals and to not waste that time feeling negative. JUST LIVE. 

Having successfully passed the challenge of experiencing a week in a foreign country by myself I feel like I am ready to enjoy my own company in many other countries and learn more about their cultures and myself along the way. I am also no longer afraid of going to bed alone. I believe I have at least learnt how to do that without feeling so lonely and wanting to cry until my eyes are swollen enough they feel tired enough to close. These last 7 days have been enjoyable, essential, educational, inspirational and possibly some of the best in my life, so far.

To all you solo travellers who embark on year long adventures I salute you. You are probably reading this thinking 'bloody hell love you've only done a week!' but if you knew me you'd know that a week alone for me is very out of character, a rare experience, in fact, one that has never happened until now. You are clearly people who were born with a strong independence and passion to live your life away with the capability of doing it alone. I am learning and one day hope to be joining you on one of your journeys and letting our paths cross.

I am going to sign off now because this has turned into a very wordy blog, focusing more on the emotive side of my trip than anything else. Thank you for reading, I'll write again soon. 

Solo rider #2

I am here. Safe and soundly I arrived at the Tej Marharba, Sousse, Tunisia at 2am!! The views from my balcony alone are breathtaking and I cannot wait to explore what I see.

This morning I have relaxed and enjoyed the beautiful words of Elizabeth Gilbert in her book "Eat, Prey, Love". Thank you Claire for this loan... It is helping me in ways I couldn't have imagined. (a review of this book will be published soon - watch this space).
The cocktails are stronger than the sun rays, which are producing around 36°C heat!! Life is on the up.

Two trips are booked,  one to the El Gjem, one of the best preserved Roman Ampitheatres in the world, and another to the medina for a rumble around the market and a rooftop hot chocolate.

I also plan on visiting Port El Katowi for a visit to the singing light fountains, which resonate those in Barcelona I visited a few years ago with my Mum. The music and lights encourage the fountains to dance!

People here are friendly and have already gone out of their way to supply me with drinks and a sense of safety. I have been asked to be someone's bride, but that is not a fate I wish to succeed!!

All in all then folks a good time on the first day is being had. I am currently on my way to Taj Mahal - a café (sadly not the Indian temple) - for a hot chocolate and some Tunisian grub. So until next time,  Bislaama (goodbye!)

Solo rider

Holiday season is upon us and it was my decision to take one on my own this year. It's a challenge, it's a big risk and I'm now feeling very apprehensive as I sit at the gate... 

After a shaky start to my holiday I am now fuelled with food and waiting at gate 35 in Gatwick's South terminal. My temperature is pretty high, but I am going to put that down to the cocktails which accompanied my Franky and Bennys dinner. I am surrounded by couples and families, but reminding myself it was my choice to come alone.

I have decided it a good idea to venture into the unknown, independently, to track down my happiness and learn a life lesson of coping and being content in my own company. My life has come to a point where I feel this necessary and so I decided it my next challenge to visit a strange country and do just that. Feels a bit crazy now, but I am still proud of myself for giving it a go. Worst case scenario I lock myself in my hotel room and read for a week! Could be worse right?

So, I will of course update as the week goes on - assuming Tunisia isn't so under-developed that WiFi hasn't reached their intelligence yet! Just know that I am going knowing two very important phrases I think will come in handy : "no" and "keep away"... !

Have you ever travelled alone? If so tips are welcomed with open arms... 

Another Blog of Birthday Gratitude

Wow, once again I have been spoiled for the second evening this week in celebration of my 25th Birthday. Not only did my friends make my actual birthday special, but they chose to continue their generousity and make my weekend full of memorable, birthday related, activities. 

The best way to tell you is to do it from my point of view, then you will understand the surprise and how amazing it was... 

I was picked up Saturday night at 8pm. I was told to wear jeans and a top but of course I rebelled and fashioned a tunic with some leggings. I gave myself a 'golden glow' and was feeling confident that I looked 'alright'! 

My 'Golden Glow'

As soon as I got in the car a tie was produced and I was instructed to blindfold myself. After a small fuss from me, worrying about my make-up, I was obedient and placed the tie over my eyes. I now had to use my picture memory to sense where I was. My friend was clever however and drove round roundabouts several times before turning off to confuse me. After about ten minutes we arrived at our destination and, still blindfolded, I was escorted out of the car and felt the floor turn to gravel/stones underneath my feet. Any ideas where I am?? 

The ground evened out after a few steps, and then I tripped up a step as my friend failed to warn me of it - we laughed as well! Suddenly, my nostrils filled with the smell of oil, like the oil you get in those wind resistant, garden candles. I was positioned and then told to remove my blindfold. 

"SURPRISE" All my amazing friends were in front of me, under a gazebo, sat on hay-bales in my friends garden. I was a tad confused but turned around and behind me I saw a screen, formed from two wooden planks and a bed sheet. Returning my focus to the gazebo I noticed a projector set up as my friends approached me for cuddles. It was an outdoor cinema they had created to celebrate my 25th birthday. I was overwhelmed, still am at how adorable the idea was. 

Everyone and me on the hay-bales under the gazebo

The gazebo was decorated with buntings which each guest had wrote nice messages upon - these are now hung up in my room. There was food and a BBQ on the go. Alcohol was served in my favourite format - cocktails! The night was amazing. Seeing all my friends under one gazebo, watching cringing clips of me performing during a summer project, to creasing with laughter over Anchorman 2. Conversation flowed until 4:30am, when we decided to call it a night. 

My beautiful messages, now hung up in my room

So, this blog, similarly to my last, is dedicated to all my friends who have made this birthday really special for me. But this time it comes with extra special thanks to Amyy Newbold, Alice Taylor, Sweeney for being the hosts of this event and Tyler Cartwright for organising the whole thing. I am truly bless to have you, plus all the guests, in my life. I cannot wait to return the favour for all of your birthdays :) 

Me and Tyler - The Organiser

Me and the Hosts - Amyy with the great face!

Fellow bloggers; What is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you for your birthday? 

Please leave any comments below :)  

Birthday Blessings

Yesterday I turned 25 years old. My birthday was celebrated in style as I was surrounded by my friends and family - all the people who mean the world to me. And if that wasn't enough, they spoiled me even more by showering me with presents and surprises. I am so grateful I feel it necessary to write a blog and discuss my birthday blessings... 

Me celebrating my birthday in style with a 'Blue Heaven' cocktail. Yummy!

For me, Birthdays are important, they mean something. They have always been something I will go out of my way for to celebrate. I love to find something that I know my loved ones will enjoy and love to open on their birthdays. Yesterday, that same passion was shared and my family and friends made it their mission to spoil me and spoil me they did. 

My amazing gifts from all my family and friends.

After a tough start to the year I have never needed such an amazing pick me up. I have felt lost since January, not knowing how to trust people anymore, struggling to know who would really be there for me when the going gets tough or when it really mattered. I now have a much better idea thanks to the amazing gestures of celebration and love I received yesterday. There is a quote I love that really does sum up a fair few of my friendships:

"Good friends are like stars, you don't always see them, but you know they are there". 

I, like everyone, have friends who I see on the odd occasion, but when I do see them, everything is amazing. Nothing has changed. Neither one of us is awkward or desperate for an explanation as to why there has been such a gap between our last meeting. We are just happy to be in one another's company and that is exactly as it should be. Some friends you will see everyday and you're no closer to them as you are the friend you see once a month, or every few months. My eyes were truly opened to this yesterday as I celebrated with all styles of friends; lifelong friends, new friends, old friends, friends I see all the time and friends I see less occasionally... They all came together to celebrate my birthday and for this I am truly lucky. 

A beautiful collage, made by Amyy Newbold, of many of my friends and family.

Just to add to the beautiful memory that was created last night, I had a final surprise in store at the end of the night. Three cakes were bought out to me from the kitchen as everyone sang 'happy birthday!' Three! That tells me that at least three people had separately visited the restaurant before last night to give them an extra special gift to present to me. The cakes were incredible and each one had a significant meaning behind it! (If you can't tell from the pictures below I am in love with pigs!) 

My fantastic cakes that bought me to tears. The First handmade by Alice Brown, the second provided by Alice Taylor and Amyy Newbold and the third bought by my Mum.

Finally then, I want to thank every person who has been involved in my birthday this year, whether you were there last night celebrating with me in person, or you drop a quick text to wish me a good day, thank you. I am so grateful and feel overwhelmed with the love I have received. Thank you .x.x.

Me and Mum before the celebrations began.

Ask Away - How Did You Get Into Reviewing?

Hello fellow friends and bloggers!

Last year I offered you all a chance to ask me any question you wanted me to answer honestly on my blog. This was really good fun last year and so I have decided to do it again this year... 

"How did you get into reviewing?"

Question by Charlotte Whittingham

I have always loved to read and get lost in a story, I enjoy visiting the theatre to watch spectacular performances, or just popping down to the local cinema to see the latest film release. Another favourite thing of mine is to discuss what I have seen or read and put across my opinion. 

As an aspiring writer I enjoyed writing down my thoughts and feelings on events and after seeing 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' at the cinema with my Mum I found myself writing my first review. I published it on my blog and shared it around and received positive feedback which encouraged me to write some more. A dear friend of mine, Liz Wilkins, who writes fantastic reviews on her own blog; ... go in touch and discussed with me the world of reviewing. I loved to her about it and it made me more enthused and passionate about writing, finally I found something worthwhile to discuss during my writing sessions. From film reviews I began to post reviews of books I had read. Using Twitter as a sharing platform I tweeted Cecelia Ahern my review on her amazing book 'One Hundred Names'. She later retweeted my blog which made my stats hit a new record of page views. Just adding more fuel to my writing flame. 

A similar experience lead me to cry with joy - I went to see Janet Devlin perform her debut album live at the O2 Academy in Oxford and decided I would try my hand at reviewing music. Being in a band myself I found the terminology came to me naturally as I discussed her fantastic music and how pleased I was that I got to meet her after the show. Much the same as with Cecelia Ahern, I tweeted my blog post of Janet Devlin. Within minutes Janet had retweeted my review and was sharing it with her followers on Twitter. My page views were through the roof that night and I just felt blessed to be accepted and put into such a confidence boosting position. 

Reviewing was something I felt really passionate about and it occurred to me that I could do this as a part-time job, volutarily, just to get my opinion out there. This is when I started to talk to a great person - Charlotte Whittingham. Charlotte introduced me to an online magazine, which within a few days I was published onto with my first review for them. More and more positive feedback and thrills later I was asked to review for another online music publication and so was enjoying spending my time reviewing for two companies. I was happy. 

Sadly, as most will know, sometimes every good thing must come to an end. I was enrolled onto a PGCE course (teacher training degree) to fulfill my life's goal of becoming a teacher. This meant that all spare time was spent on PGCE assignments and lesson planning for my placement. Reviewing became a distant hobby as time in between each post was lengthened. I decided I had to focus all my attention on my studies which meant sacrificing my love for reviewing for the time being.  

There is of course a happy ending! I have now passed my first year of my degree, and with only one more year to go I aim to be reviewing again soon with hopes of joining another online publication who accepts my writing and shares my thoughts with the rest of the online world! 

Thank you Charlotte for this question. It has been a pleasure discussing my history with reviewing and has really sparked a flame to try and find some more time to squeeze in a review here and there, to keep my writing skills updated and ready for when I can commit real time to produce some more reviews :) 

If you have a question you would like to ask me please comment below... 

Review of a Live Performance - Matilda

Matilda, a name that resonates in my generation thanks to the great children's author, Roald Dahl. Written in 1988 Matilda succeeded in becoming a classic children's book, one many still read today, filled with magic and hope. When adapted into a film in 1996 it was a hit with those familiar and those unaware of the girl with telekinesis powers. Having premiered at the RSC and being a sell out in 2010, Matilda the Musical now lives at The Cambridge Theatre, London. Written by playwright Dennis Kelly, with music and lyrics by the anarchic comedian Tim Minchin, the performance makes for great entertainment, resonating from ages 5 up! With colourful lighting, catchy rhythms and relatable characters to keep the children engaged, adults are left laughing hysterically at the humour integrated throughout the characters and songs. 

If you don't know the story, it follows the life of a mistreated young girl, Matilda, who soon realises she has extraordinary intelligence and talent. Too involved in TV Mr and Mrs Wormwood, along with her nasty brother Michael, strive in making Matlida's life a misery. Matilda is over-joyed when sent to school, only to find that what awaits her there is much, much worse. The headmistress, Miss Trunchbull. An ex-Olympian hammer throw reigns the school and projects her negative thoughts towards children explicitly through punishing them with cruelty, such as locking them in the 'Chokey'; a room small enough to stand with nails and glass protruding from the walls, floor and door. Matilda's school teacher, Miss Honey, offers to encourage Matilda's skill whilst she receives no such luxury from anyone else. A dark secret is revealed causing Matilda to seek revenge against all those who do wrong to herself, her classmates and Miss Honey.  

The special effects team are due the greatest attention thanks to their heart stopping, jaw dropping moments of sheer brilliance. It is hard to imagine how they could achieve some of the cruel tricks presented in the book and film, Bruce Bogtrotter eating an entire chocolate cake, Amanda Thripp being swung around the playground by her pigtails and flung into the sky by the Trunchbull's ex-Olympian skill. Even moments of Matilda's telekinesis is produced leaving the audience in complete awe of the technical ability. A very successful team who have worked well to produced a spectacle.

The actors also deserve a great deal of credit, owing to the fact that the majority of them are children! Each child performer is buzzing with infectious energy and creates a fantastic and fun atmosphere for the audience to soak up and enjoy. Whilst the performance is aimed mostly at children, the adult audience members were of course catered for with off the cuff comments and cheeky looks from those on stage. The adults were also brilliant with their camp, over the top talents. Although slightly pantomime, especially Mr Wormwood's acting, they managed to keep the audience begging for more as each scene is ended with roars of laughter and thunderous applaud. 

It is a performance for all the family and an absolute must see I should add! If you grew up with Matilda being read to you, or have seen it on the big screen, it is now time for you to go and witness the live performance. It will blow your mind with it's absolute spectacular representation of a Roald Dahl classic. 

Crave - A Review

4 people in a space. Are they all representing the same person at different stages of life? Are they simply strangers? Or best friends?
Their emotions run wild as they use Sarah Kane's poetic words to tell their stories and communicate seductively,  passionately and brutally raw with one another. Relay what you have experienced, tell what you know. Share, confess, beg. 4 people in a space. All connected somehow, all discussing the same thing; Love. Life. Pain. Death. All that was. All that is. And all that is to come. Kane's poetic technique is divine, powerfully forcing an audience into a hypnotised silence that hold onto every single syllable. Spoken with pure articulation that leaves breath caught somewhere between your lungs and your lips. Entrancing and beautiful. Romantic and violent. Mixture of emotions thats snaps you away from the real world, for just a short duration of time.

What: Sarah Kane's Crave
Who: Hypnotist Theatre
When: Thursday 12th June
Where: Burton Taylor Studio, Oxford.